No place I'd rather be

My baby boy stirred beside me, rousing me from my slumber. It was midnight. And although I've actually been sleeping for only a couple of hours, it certainly feels like my body has regained much strength, as if I've already slept for 8 hours rather than 2. I felt my bladder screaming release and got quite annoyed because going to the bathroom at this hour only means two things. I'm going to fully awaken my sleeping brain and spend the rest of the night awake, or I can crawl my way to the bathroom and convince my semi-awake brain into thinking that I am still asleep and to not let go of what little sleep is left. Unfortunately (or fortunately!), it was the former.

I succumbed to my desire to check my social media accounts in the middle of the night and after about half an hour into it, I gently rolled over to my husband's side and whispered that I can't sleep. Unfortunately for me, the husband has not an ounce of strength to spare to keep me company. He dozed off before I even finished my sentence.

And so there I lay in my state of wakefulness, staring into what just earlier in the night were fully charged glow-in-the-dark stars in our bedroom ceiling and decided to write down my one and only thought this peaceful night.

The reality of the moment is this, I am squished in between my sleeping husband and baby. And as I feel the warmth of their bodies on either side of me, I think, there is no place I would rather be than here. I may be the only one awake at this time but I don't feel alone at all. My heart is full.

I smile as I offer up a silent prayer to the Lord, thanking Him for His goodness and grace. And for the gift of here and now.

As I stare at my son in the darkness, I can see the outlines of his face, the gentle waves of his hair, the slight pout of his lips, and I think, "Hey, little guy, I look just like you!" I smell his hands, catching a whiff of milk that had dried up from his most recent feeding. I memorize his scent. I stay this way for a while, staring, drinking him in, until finally a bout of sleepiness envelopes me and I sleep, deeply and blissfully into the night.

Quick pregnancy update!

I'm happy to report that i'm 10w/4d pregnant yesterday. :) Last Saturday, Mon and I heard Dotty's heartbeat for the very first time via Doppler. Dotty's heartbeat is so fast, we couldn't get any more excited than hearing that strong, quick sound going dug dug dug dug dug...

My third month will end in about a couple of weeks or so and I can't wait to finally bid my first trimester goodbye. The higher risk of miscarriage in the first trim is scaring me out of my wits! Though during my last prenatal checkup, my OB assured me that malakas ang kapit ni Dotty so I was quite relieved and reassured to hear that.

My baby bump is still not noticeable to everyone as it just kind of looks like extra tummy fat at first glance. I can prove this because no one ever offers me a seat in the train! But my officemates and other people close to me can already see the difference. The first and only stranger so far who had noticed is the Ayala jeep fare collector. Though he's technically not a stranger as we've been familiar with each other for four years already.

I'll talk about my pregnancy in more detail after my first trim. Pregnancy signs, what I went through, did I make lihi or not?, baby names! and other random stuff. But for now, let me just rest and talk to my baby Dotty. Have a good day, everyone!

There you are, little Dotty!

Super exciting! Today we got to see our little angel, a.k.a. Dotty, through ultrasound!

Why Dotty? Well, at 6 weeks, he/she is really, visually, just a little dot... a blip with a heartbeat! Mon and I were so thrilled to see our little angel's heart beating. It still can't be heard through Doppler but seeing Dotty wiggle his/her strong little heart is enough for us to be happy for now!

Aaahh, the joys of pregnancy. It really is nothing short of a miracle.